One Year Anniversary

Saturday, January 31, 2009 was the one year anniversary of my Peace Corps South Africa 17’s arrival in Africa. I had lunch with some friends and spent the afternoon checking out bed and breakfasts for my Dad and Sue’s visit that is scheduled for September. It was a rather relaxed and monotonous day which was not really marked by any major event or excitement. However, the significance of the date has left me thinking a lot about this last year.
How do I put into words the major shifts in living situations, language, social atmosphere, and most importantly; thinking that I have experienced since I left the States in January 2008? I am astounded by what I have been through in the past year. To be honest, I have lived and loved far more freely than I have ever before. Is it because this is supposedly where mankind began? Is there some inherent wholeness to living in Africa? Maybe. Maybe not. All I know is that I have experienced tremendous change since I have arrived here. Some changes resulting in growth and others leaving me completely lost.

As I have said before, I live at the Inkululeko Toddler’s Home. It is a place of safety for orphaned and abandoned children. Some of the children have known their parents and watched them pass away. Others were very badly abused and are seeking protection here. The rest have been abandoned, some in public places, others out in locations where their parents’ never hoped the child would be found. All of these children somehow made it here though. All eleven of the children at my house have completely different stories with at least one common thread that has bound them together. I was never abandoned, orphaned, or abused and somehow I also found my way to this place as well, this place of safety. Peace Corps did not place me here. I was living in a township about 45 minutes away from my current residence. I would have never heard about this place if it was not for a chance meeting with my principal and the founder of this organization. I would have never ended up living here if the taxi fare to and from work was not as expensive as it was and the lady I was staying with passed away a few months after I moved, both of which are unfortunate but real matters. I could have very easily ended up somewhere else; things could have been very different. Yet, somehow so many small things fell into place that would pave the way for me to end up here. And here I am. I am exactly where I am meant to be.

I have been living at this home for almost ten months and I could not possibly begin to do justice to the profound work that these children have done in my life. I came to Africa looking for direction while also intending to lose it entirely. I have done both. I came here knowing what I wanted to do when I returned to America. Now, I am unsure. I came here having no idea of what to do here in Africa, yet I know exactly what I want to do now and I am doing it. So I have direction. In fact, I have many directions and perhaps this is why I am on my way and totally lost. Yet, it could not possibly feel better. I think that when you let go of the notions of what you think you should be and how important it is that certain things remain a specific way because they are right and going in any different direction would be wrong, you suddenly become just a little bit freer. Things that seemed so important and were the origin of so much stress in the past now seem inconsequential. And things that you never imagined you would be able to experience or believe now confront you head on and more surprisingly you are able to deal with them and slowly you learn to embrace the journey with all of its surprises and challenges.

I am aware that this rambling does not contain any real details of what I have been up to recently and maybe that would be more entertaining to read. I am sorry if it is a disappointment and I promise to write more anecdotes about my last couple of months, but this is just what I felt like sharing today. I hope you can relate to this unfinished madness of a blog. Until next time…